Aviendha
Hey! I don't mean to be rude, but personally I think that less is more and in my opinion it would have been far better to shorten the whole Arthur dying - family saying goodbye etc. Besides, none of it seems too realistic (a little bit like those Mexican soap operas, if you know what I mean). Molly is first and foremost a sensible woman and I can tell you that no mother who loves her children more than her own life would leave two of them to fend for themselves, regardless of who it was that died, even her hubby. Leaving your two youngest children, one of them a pregnant and therefore encumbered daughter, in such a situation is plain stupid. And I don't care that Arthur was the love of her life.
Also, I fail to see the need to include Draco's memories of Arthur in all of this, it's too distracting given that you already have so much going on. Quite superfluous, too, since we all know what a great guy Arthur is and that Draco must have respected and liked him. I confess I only skimmed that section because it really didn't seem necessary for the storyline, nor as characterization. I think you could easily mold the last two chapters into one. You are so good with portraying the feelings and emotions of characters, you have proven it time and again, but somehow this Arthur thing has become way too pathetic in my opinion.
Whereas the scene between Draco and Hermione is beautifully done. The way we don't see into her mind this time, but are left free to imagine and guess works perfectly here. Of course, every scene between then is emotionally very repetitive, but that makes sense because of the vicious circle they're caught in.
That said, we all have our own opinions, and I'm sure someone will tell you exactly the opposite of my review. :) We're all grateful for your updates and I'm sure we're all aware of how difficult it must be to wrap up all of the loose ends when there are so many.
A/N: Hey, thanks for the review. I really appreciate honest reviews coming from my readers. (Even if it does make me lie my head on the desk in defeat :P) I took notice of what you said about Arthurs death and asked around, and although there was no one else that felt that way, i have since gone back and been editing that chapter. I just wanted to work more on getting the next update out rather than dwell too much on editing a chapter most readers have already read.
Chapter 63 is rather more of a carry on from where chapter 62 left off. However, do you think it would be too long if i put them both together and started chapter 64 as Hermione and Draco's scene? I must confess I've been a lil off recently. My partner of two years and I broke up and I've had some very important medical results, and although its not really an excuse, i have found the aspect of tying all the loose threads together a bit daunting.
Its also hard to meet with what everyone wants from this fic. I've had people daunted and in some cases, outraged by the darkness in this fic to people asking me why more people have not been killed or tortured. Although the flash backs to Arthur may be distracting my aim was to create the calm before the storm. I know readers know how important Arthur's character is but I know that every fic is different. I felt the need to explain some form of loss for Draco now that the only man he'd ever had as a great father figure has died. (It also might be necessary for later. **wink wink**
It is really hard to juggle what I want from the fic and what other people want. I don't want to write something for me only to find myself disheartened by a lot of comments wishing I'd done things better or differently. :( Its hard. Having said that, I really do appreciate your honesty and would love it if you could help me with said chapters. If you think I should put them together please can you email me?
Gryffindorgirl2010@hotmail.co.uk
I know its a lot to ask and I'm probably taking away the fun that is being a reader but if you can spare the time to just talk to me about those chapters I'd really appreciate it. (I will stand firm though, im afraid i cant take out Draco's flashbacks.) As for Molly remaining... well :P How do you know she isn't needed? For that matter I also needed a reason for Ron to go back. I may have painted him as a bumbling idiot but even he wouldn't have returned if the only reason had been to fetch Harry's body.
It's really hard to please everyone with this fic so I hope you can appreciate that. I really want everyone to enjoy it and love it for their own reasons but I know there are going to be some very disappointed ppl out there. I just hope they're in the minority :(
**sigh** I'm really worried people won't like where this is going :(
V xxx
